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The name of this week’s Parsha, Chayei Sarah (the life of Sarah) contains an interesting paradox. These words imply that we are going to be told about her life, while in fact the parsha deals solely with the story of her death and burial. Seemingly, this verse merely comes to tell us how many years she lived before announcing her death in the following verse as it says “ And the life of Sarah was one –hundred-twenty-seven, the years of the life of Sarah. And Sarah died in Kiriath-arba… “ ( Breishit 23:1-2) But if we look more carefully at this verse we will discover that we learn a great deal about Sarah’s life. The seemingly repetitive phrase at the end of the verse, “the years of the life of Sarah”, reveals much about her character and outlook on life. According to Rashi, the repetition of these words suggests that all her years were equally good. As we know Sarah’s life was filled with many difficult challenges, which makes Rashi’s comment somewhat puzzling. She was taken away from her husband twice, was childless until the age of 90 and had to endure the tormenting conflict and family tension caused by Hagar and Yishmael. The verse, however implies that she maintained a positive disposition in spite of all her difficulties. While the first part of the verse tells us how many years she lived the last 3 words hint to us that all her years were filled with life. That her exuberance and love of life were present throughout. She must have had the ability to focus on the good in every situation, never taking anything for granted.
Pirkei Avot (2:13) describes this characteristic as “Ayin Tova” (good eye). It is listed as one of the lofty attributes which man should cleave to throughout his life. We are generally more inclined to notice what’s wrong with a situation rather than what’s right. We also tend to blame our bad mood and state of mind on external conditions. Steven Covey in “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”, addresses this problem when discussing ‘Habit 1 – Be Proactive’. He says that while we can’t control what happens to us, we all have the power to control or choose our response to any given stimulus. “Proactive people can carry their own weather with them. Whether it rains or shines makes no difference to them… As Eleanor Roosevelt observed, ‘No one can hurt you without your consent.’ ” (pg 71-72) Human beings are blessed with the gift of free choice. Inherent in this gift is our ability to fill our days with happiness and maintain a positive attitude even in the most trying circumstances.

Years ago, I had the privilege to hear Mikey Butler (A”H) speak at an NCSY Shabbaton. He shared some of his thoughts about the famous dictum ‘Gam Zu L’Tova’ (This too is for the best) He urged everyone to take nothing for granted and always see the good in every situation. At the end of his speech he coughed profusely into his hand and said, ‘Please excuse me, I suffer from Cystic Fibrosis.’ Thus, he continued to provide strength and inspiration to all those in his midst until the day he died at the age of 23. Like Sarah, his 23 years were filled with exuberance and love of life. May we learn from these great people and approach each day with confidence and gratitude!